It Takes A Woman!
by hc.dbz.chickie
Summary: Crackfic! It has three anime series, but the characters stay in their own universes; the only thread that connects the story is that they are all put in the same situation. It was 2 or 3 am when I wrote this, so it's kinda out there and not as cohesive as my usual stuff. Rated K for some language (is that the right rating)? Disclaimer: I don't own any of it!


It Takes a Woman!

All across Animeland, warriors were gearing up for the most awful day of the year.

ooooo

At Capsule Corps, Trunks and Goten are masking their ki and hiding in the downstairs lab. (Trunks tries to push Goten into the hall, "Come on, you idiot, if Gohan finds _you_, maybe Mom'll leave _me_ alone.)

ooooo

In the Kurosaki household, Karin and Yuzu are stomping about the house and getting ready quietly, respectively. (Kon stays the hell outta Karin's way.)

ooooo

In Makai, Kuwabara hides behind Hiei and bawls, "Don't let them get me, Giri-no-ani!" (To which Hiei bashes him on the head and tells him he will _never_ be his brother in law.)

ooooo

In Konoha, pre-genin everywhere are reduced to quivering masses of five-year-old goo. (At least the ones who've been assigned to Iruka-sensei's classroom, anyways. The ones who got Shikimaru-sensei and Hinata-sensei are actually relieved, and even excited.)

Oh, yeah! It's . . . . THE FIRST DAY BACK TO SCHOOL!

. . . . . . . . . . . . .

Back at Capsule Corps, Gohan wanders down the halls and shouts, "Goten, if I don't get you to your first day of school, Mom is going to KILL me with that frying pan!"

Vegeta pelts the lab walls with blasts as he hollers, "That woman locked me out of the damn gravity room until you get your ass to class. Now COME OUT!"

ooooo

Back at the Kurosaki household, Isshin and Ichigo peer at Karin from behind the kitchen door. "Go tell her she has to hurry up or she'll be late for school."

"What, me? Are you kidding? You go do it, dammit- you're her father!"

"You're just scared."

"Damn right."

ooooo

Back in Konoha, all the brats who were lucky enough to get Iruka are clinging to their mother's legs and shouting, "You can't make me go!" as two of Iruka's teaching assistants for the week, Kiba and Naruto, try to drag them in b their feet, making funny H shapes between them, the child and their mother.

. . . . . . . . . . . . .

Finally, at Capsule Corps, Bulma and Videl get fed up. Videl storms downstairs, grabs Goten by the ear and uses a well-aimed boot to the butt to send him flying in the direction of the elementary school. "There," she says as she rushes her hands off, "now you have time to make out with me."

Gohan gulps.

Bulma laughs at them as she turns to her own son and informs him that if he does not get to school _now_, that he will not get dinner _ever_. He beats Goten to school.

ooooo

Tatsuki finally tells Orihime to wait on the front landing as she barges in to Ichigo's house and asks him what the hell is taking so long.

Ichigo shakily points a finger at Karin. "She's scaring me."

Tatsuki rolls her eyes. "Karin, if you want to learn how to fight properly and have me tutor you in karate, you need to put your damn head on straight and get to school before you make us all late."

Karin glares. Tatsuki glares. Ichigo and Yuzu sneak outside to wait with Orihime and the newly arrived Chad and Ishida.

Five minutes later, Karin is dragged out by Tatsuki by the scruff of her neck, with a band-aid on her knee, arm and cheek. As they walk to school, everyone gives Tatsuki a wide berth.

ooooo

In Konoha, Anko finally gets sick of watching from her window. She walks outside, gives Iruka a nod, to which he smiles, and tells the kids in her most dangerously low voice that they have exactly five seconds to get into their classroom. They take one look at her crazy eyes and are not only in the door by two, but in their seats at three.

Iruka chuckles and gives Anko a friendly wave.

. . . . . . . . . . . . .

Happy School Year to all those who want to hide under the covers on the first day back like me and my friends (I have several who are teachers—Iruka rocks, BTW . . . . I want teachers like him. Sigh.)


End file.
